Wednesday, 30 July 2014

Troublemaker 2

Troublemaker 2

Pairs of students were scattered around the classroom working on a history assignment. Mr Parks was at the front marking papers, he was a mid thirties good looking man, the attention to his work showed he got great pleasure from being a teacher. The silver metaled wedding ring on his finger gleaming proudly, kind of showing off he was a happily married young man where his whole life is together. Jamie and Chessie were partnered up, to the far left of the class, looking as though they were working, but instead had a hidden rock music magazine underneath the history papers, scanning hot guys. They got too excited over one guy and their disruptive outburst caused Mr Parks to look up from his work.

"Jamie, Chessie, quiet" Mr Parks said.

The tone in Mr Parks' voice demanded he'd be listened too and his eyes were strong on his targets. Even though he was a younger teacher than most, the way he executed his command showed he could be strong when he needed to be. Jamie and Chessie took it like it was routine, but were straight back to their devious ways reading the magazine, also like routine.

"I can't stand him or History. It's doing my head in" Jamie said.
"I know. It's stupid" Chessie replied.

They flicked in and out of the History assignment just so they wouldn't fail it altogether. The piece was on something to do with Henry the eighth. Then Jamie's Iphone vibrated and she got a message from a friend through Facebook. She opened up her Facebook App and the friend announced there was going to be a "Kick ass party" that weekend. Jamie posted "All bets are off. Boooooom!" on the timeline, and out of nowhere Mr Parks was standing right over them.

"Right, detention you two. Phone, now" Mr Parks said

Jamie wasn't that much of a rebel to challenge Mr Parks in that situation, so she handed the phone over. Mr Parks walked back to his desk, put the phone in his draw and his hawk brown eyes peered at the naughty kids. Jamie and Chessie kept their heads low to the desk, muttering under their breaths when they saw Mr Parks eyes were coast of clear.

"Parasite. I can't stand him" Jamie said.

The silence in the detention room made it seem like something sinister, like something out of a movie, that's how the girls felt. It was so quiet. The clock ticked and every tock seemed like a hundred seconds than one. Jamie and Chessie were sat on either side of the room, this made them feel even more isolated. Mr Parks was at the front in his usual sitting position with the same concentrated but relaxed expression. Jamie felt like her soul was taking a constant hammering because she was forced to be one on one with her History assignment. She could do it, she wasn't dumb, she just hated the subject.

Both of the girls were thrown into amazement when they saw Mr Parks jabbering away at his mobile phone. They looked at each other from across the room, slightly opened mouthed with looks which spoke "Is he taking the piss?!" Plus, Mr Parks seemed excited, shining differently in a way the girls had never seen before. "He's probably texting his perfect young wife what they are cooking for dinner that night and what wine they were going to have with it, stupid perfect boring cunts" Jamie thought. When the texting was done, Mr Parks saw the girls looking at him but darting back to their work at the same time. The girls thought they were going to receive another teachers lecture, but to their surprise Mr Parks wasn't looking at them. Instead he seemed like the one in the guilt, almost hiding behind his sheets of work sheepishly. Jamie and Chessie looked at each other weirdly.

After school, Jamie and Chessie were in their usual hut out in the nearby fields. They were in a fowled mood, still scowling over the detention and the resentment they had towards Mr Parks and the subject History. Jamie was rattling on about how she would love to see Mr Parks fired somehow, where Chessie was coming up with suggestions as to how that could happen, even though both of them knew it was mainly just unbottling the whining. To the girls amazement! They couldn't believe it when they saw a car pull up at a far end of the field, to see Mr Parks and another younger teacher, Mrs English get out of the car, kissing each other rapidly.

"Isn't that Mr Parks?" Chessie said.
"That's Mrs English with her" Jamie replied and both of the girls looked at each other with OMG!
"Oh. My. God. It is" Jamie continued and they both returned to each other with supercharge in their eyes.
"Come on, let's do some messin" Jamie said.

They both ran towards the car, but carefully not to be seen. Mr Parks and Mrs English had bundled into a barn, in the super heat of passion, almost kissing each others face off. Inside the barn Mr Parks and Mrs English fell on a sack of hay and were really going at each other, tearing each others clothes off as they kissed frantically. Jamie and Chessie arrived at the barn door and peered inside, open mouthed.

“Can you believe it? He’s with Mrs English” Chessie said.
“So much for being married” Jamie replied maliciously.
“I know right”

Mrs English was a brunette, skinny, classic featured mid thirties lady. By this time her glasses were off, her skirt and shirt was eighty percent removed, Mr Parks shirt was off and his trousers were coming down. Jamie had removed her Iphone, loading up the camera.

“Oh go on, you read my mind” Chessie said.

Jamie took pictures, so many it was as though she couldn't take enough. By now Mr Parks had entered Mrs English and was thrusting her in a missionary type position against the hay. Jamie’s eyes grew more and more with devilishness as she took more and more pictures.

“There goes History lessons” Jamie said.
“Right place at the right time hey. We’re so lucky” Chessie replied.

Now Mr Parks bent Mrs English further backwards, a hand gripping each of her ankles, slamming her from upright as she moaned whilst lying on her back. Jamie had got enough pictures, the gleam in her eyes were sick like, sick with triumph.

“Mrs English though! She’s a bit stuck up” Chessie said.
“She’s young like him... Or young for people their age!” Jamie replied. Then they both sneaked away from the barn, running through the field elated.

In class, Mr Parks was walking around the room collecting the pairs of students History assignments. When he arrived at Jamie and Chessie, he took the folder of work from the desk, but not noticing the girls staring at him with laughter ready to burst under their breaths. His wedding ring seemed to shine a lot brighter to them on this occasion. When he sat at his desk, he went through the assignments straight away. Jamie and Chessie were like two balloons filling up, the air ready to release at any moment, as they sniggered as quietly as they could. About half an hour later, Mr Parks pulled out a photo of him and Mrs English having sex from Jamie and Chessie’s assignment, his heart sank, but that followed immediately with fiery attention on the girls.

“Jamie, Chessie, outside with me. Now!” Mr Parks shouted.

They girls found it funny so much they were laughing as they left the room. The rest of the students jumped like they never had done before when Mr Parks shouted at the girls, they looked at each other surprised at the side they never thought was in the good looking, love for being a teacher, teacher. Outside the girls stood by the wall and Mr Parks faced them directly.

“Is this some sort of joke?” Mr Parks said.
“No. This is our trade to getting out of History and you giving us an A this term” Jamie replied.
“To the principles office. Now”
“Shut up, you can't do anything. Not if you don't want your wife to find out about this” Jamie continued.
"Yeah" Chessie added.

Jamie held up more pictures of the incident and put them away again quicker. Mr Parks said nothing and his state went neutral. Jamie and Chessie sensed victory when they saw the transformation in him, it seemed they had literally out beaten their teacher!

“Fine. The two of you are excused from History” Mr Parks said.

And that was that, he darted into the room. Then returned a few moments later with the girls bags.

“And if you tell anybody about this, I will have you both expelled. Pictures getting out or not. Got it!”
“Yes” the girls replied simultaneously.

In her room, Jamie layed on her bed texting to her boyfriend Luke. She was excited to be meeting him that day, being Saturday. When she confirmed to meet him at one, she put her phone on the bed and went into a ponder. It seemed like a mission that could only be accomplished in the movies; how she got out of History for the rest of the year, she thought. How she did it, she still didn't know, perhaps she just got lucky, but still patted herself on the back for a job well achieved. A touch of emotion came when she thought about "poor old Mr Parks" and how he must have been feeling. But Jamie's soul was a large degree cold and always thought "In  order to get ahead, some people have to get burnt" an attitude which kept her devious ways going, and one day will be her downfall, although she didn't know that yet.

Jamie's mum entered her room and gave Jamie her History exams scores which came through the post. Jamie opened them with a look of expectance, and what she saw was an "A". She punched the air knowing it was kind of coming like a fixed boxing fight, then texted Chessie the news and got a reply two seconds later that she had got an "A" too.

Saturday, 26 July 2014

Old Before Your Time

Old Before Your Time

It was a Saturday night and she sat on the settee knitting, a cup of coco by her side and Strictly Come Dancing on the TV. Her name was Melanie, a Canadian. She had a softly spoken voice and the most golden hair, the type you saw on a retriever. Melanie enjoyed her knitting, her current project was a baby boys onesie. The bottom half was complete, she was now knitting the top half. Thoughts took hold of her mind from time to time as she knitted; that it being a Saturday night and she was in, doing some would call 'grandma' stuff instead of being out with her friends. She got a text message on her Iphone and it was her friend Bell who wanted to know for a final time if she was coming out. Melanie text back saying she was fine staying in and for them to have a good time.

Once Strictly had finished, Melanie put on the Sky recorded X Factor. She did this every Saturday, she loved her X Factor, but Strictly always came first. The baby's onesie was coming along. Soon enough she went to make another cup of coco. As she waited for the kettle to boil she thought about her boyfriend, Henry who was out with his friends that night. Melanie's old before her time ways picked at Henry a bit, Melanie knew this. But Henry wasn't going to make it a massive issue of it because that was a thing which made Melanie un-perfect, but it did raise slight concerns. The kettle boiled and Melanie made her coco, she went back into the front room and all of a sudden worry filled her mind of something bad going to happen. She didn't know what it was, but it was present and she couldn't fully relax for a while.

The next morning, Melanie was at the dinning table in the kitchen, whilst Henry was busy at work on the stoves making the Sunday fry up. Melanie watched him do this, it made her giggle how seriously Henry took those fry ups, also knowing it was one of his proud rituals. Henry was American, very successful for twenty four, he already had two businesses and two properties. Soon enough he sat the plates down, kissed his woman, said to enjoy and they tucked in. By the end of the meal, there was a look in Henry's eye. It was something Melanie had never seen before and he hit her with it.

"Babe. It isn't working out" Henry said.

Melanie was shell shocked. They then had the biggest discussion of their lives, but Melanie sensed it was only heading one way; she was being dumped. She wasn't foolish enough to believe Henry needed her more than she needed him, but as the conversation plateaued, she knew Henry had made his decision and was sticking to it, he was good at that. She begged for the reasons why he wanted to end it which Henry gave reasons, but not the hidden motive and she realized Henry was doing this not to hurt her feelings even more. She knew she was being dumped because she was boring and one of those who were old before their time, the way everyone said she was from the age of five.

It was another Saturday and Melanie was working in the local launderette. Her face was more tired, baggy and her body looked weaker. From a strangers perspective she seemed far too young and beautiful to look that worn out. Melanie was ironing sheets, lost in thoughts of her life. She was too tough to let her recent life's mishaps crash and burn her, so she fought on and the launderette job was weekend work for extra money. She needed it now she was living on her own, her day job only just scraped her by, she had to work seven days a week until she got a better paid job. She prepared to iron the next lump of sheet amongst the mountains she still had to do.

Paul walked into the launderette, he was a tall half bald old British man in his seventies. It was his usual routine Saturday washing time. He got his clothes started in the machine, sat down and read his newspaper, the same paper every Saturday. He and Melanie were familiar with each other by now, waved, said "Hi" sharpening the saw of small talk. It did catch Paul's attention; Melanie's young and beautiful nature being taken over by the stressed out life of a mid wife at forty five. Likewise Melanie thought about Paul; how his life was in his old age, how routine he was, he was probably a Virgo she thought. Underneath the analysis, Melanie sensed Paul was lonely, which he was, and Paul sensed Melanie was lonely, which she was.

"You do a fabulous job" Paul said as he was leaving, Melanie folding sheets.
"Thank you" Melanie replied.
"Pop round for tea sometime"

From the delivery, Melanie knew the offer came from someone seeking a friend, and it made her happy because she really needed one at this point. Plus Paul really reminded her of her granddad she missed dearly back in Canada, along with the rest of her family. She replied "OK" and Paul wrote his address down on a piece of paper and gave it to her.

It was just like Melanie thought, Paul was a hermit. He sat in his same spot in the front room, watched his same programs at exactly the same times, he ate the same foods at exactly the same times, he went to bed and got up in the mornings at exactly the same times. She had known him for a while now and as much as she wanted to say to him that sometimes he could be "too so" she agreed to let him be himself because that was everyone's right. It was a Thursday night and they were watching Masterchef, the pair of them loved this program. Paul let out his whales at the TV, getting really into it. Melanie liked the comfort of the simple two bedroom flat which Paul rented off the landlord catered for by his pension.

Sometimes Melanie took time to watch Paul as his single minded mind was glued to the TV. It turned out his wife had passed away some years ago and now he had been on his own for more than ten years. Melanie could tell Paul really wanted to meet someone new, or just something to change in his life, but he was unfortunately stuck in that flat and the area because it was all his pension would allow him. But still it was nice company Melanie felt, she didn't have anyone these days; she hadn't met anyone else, her friends had ditched her because they were moving on from her boring ways, and as she remembered, Paul reminded her of her family. It was never going to be anything more than that, although she was sure romance had crossed Paul's mind even just once. He was a guy after all.

They walked along the park, it was a really hot Saturday. It was a lovely suggestion Melanie thought and was a refreshing change after her eight till four shift at the launderette. Paul needed the exercise as his legs were aging by the day. Soon they found a place to sit on the floor and relax. They talked about things, it was really cool Melanie felt how they always had new things to talk about even though they didn't do any new. Paul was a very wise man and sarcastic and he could always find useful knowledge on topics to share. To Melanie's surprise and un-comfort she saw Henry in the park with what looked to be his new girlfriend. He saw her and stopped then did something Melanie wouldn't have expected, he waved her over. She didn't know why she went, she should have turned the other way she thought, but she didn't and put it down to weakness. She told Paul she'd be right back before she left.

"Hi Melanie" Henry said.
"Hi" Melanie replied.
"This is Patsy". Melanie and Patsy greeted somewhat awkwardly..
"Is everything OK?" Henry said.
"Yes" Melanie replied.
"Why are you with that old guy?"
"He's my friend"

Henry looked at Paul and then Melanie with confusion. His kind of shallow girlfriend was exactly the same. From his position, Paul felt for the first time the reality of things, watching his new best friend find the birds she was meant to be with.

At Paul's, Masterchef was on the TV. Paul seemed a touch different, Melanie sensed this but it didn't seem like an issue. Then the door bell rang.

"Don't worry, I'll get it" Melanie said.
"OK" Paul replied.

Melanie jumped up leaving Paul glued to the TV. It was the semi finals and Melanie knew Paul didn't want to miss a second. At the door, Ken, a twenty one year old young professional just like Melanie stood. Melanie was twenty one, but she wouldn't call herself a professional yet because she hadn't found a job with a proper career. Ken said he was having a barbecue the next weekend and that all the neighbors were invited. Melanie said she'd let Paul know and that they would both definitely go. Ken was a half Thai, half English striking guy. Totally working class and Melanie found that attractive because it brought out a kind of fearlessness nature in Ken. He had lived above Paul's flat for about six months on his own.

Back in the front room, Melanie told Paul about Ken's barbecue, Paul responded with positive feedback followed with a double barrel.

"You should go out with him" Paul said.
"How do you mean? I'm not dater right now" Melanie replied.
"But you have to at some point and you know it". Melanie knew part of this was true.
"As much as I love your company, it isn't healthy for a young bird to be wrapped around old feathers all the time. You are twenty one and you should be mixing with other young birds".

Melanie appreciated Paul's straightness, that was one of his best qualities. Again, she liked his company just for what it was, no more, no less. And that she was one of those people who were the 'young old' type. But it was true, it was time to mix with her years again.

At the launderette, Melanie was working, putting a customers sheets into one of the machines. Ken walked in with no bags and went to her.

"Hey Melanie" Ken said.
"Hey Ken" Melanie replied.
"I think we are being set up"
"Really? By who?"
"Really? I thought he might"
"I think it is quite cute. He's a really good man"
"Yes he is"
"I'll be happy to go out if you are" Charm smothered Melanie's face and soul, not just about Ken, but Paul too.

Ken left and Melanie couldn't help to feel so happy, she felt like a ten year old who just got their first peck on the lips. Ken was awesome, so handsome she thought, and felt ready to build her life back up properly again, in all areas. Then she thought about Paul and how much of a rock he was.

Sunday, 20 July 2014

Limp Wrist

Limp Wrist

He was shy to be himself. Until he broke his wrist and then it all came together.

There were woman's heels all over the floor, skirts, make up, everything I'd imagine a woman having in their bedroom. Not like this as if a bomb had gone off, I exaggerated because I am a guy who wants to be a woman, but you get the what I mean. I'd usually start off the day naked and look in the mirror. I'd slide my low cut ladies shorts on, followed by the bra. Soon enough the heels and shirt was on. The make up was next and then finally the wig. I loved this wig, the hair reached past my shoulders, blonde, the light colour showed off my face I found rather than a darker colour. I think I looked good, as a guy I wasn't bad looking either. I had a sharp jaw line I was grateful of, I could have been a stud if I didn't want to be a woman. This reflection was also a curse a religious fanatic cold argue, because my dream ended in that bedroom and the next routine was to take all the clothes and make up off and be a guy again.

"Groundhog Day" was a movie which played on my mind from time to time, as well as that track "A Well Respected Man" by "The Kinks". Right now I was walking up the same road to do the same Thursday evening shopping. The same routine, week in week out. I got to Sainsbury's, that was getting annoying, even just the colour, that fucking orange. However I found Tesco's had shit food, a Waitrose was non existent in this part of South London. I did love Mark and Spencers, but the only one wasn't for miles. I don't know why I did my food shopping on a Thursday evening, I think I will change it, hm!

Some nosy old stuck up bag keeps looking at me. It is so irritating. I feel like saying "yes, my trolley is full with tights, nail vanish, tampons, woman's shavers and Special K in amongst my low calorie foods. And what?" I've seen her three times on three separate isles and every time she peers into my basket and then at me, using her woman's intuition knowing those stuff is for me. She looked weird; she had eyes that were too far a part and wore glasses I hoped were fake to just cover up her childhood torment of being called hammer head. That should teach her if the truth came out. And she held onto what looked to be her husbands arm too tightly, like showing off that she was all happily and in love. Maybe I am being cynical because I am single and would like somebody, but you know what I am on about. The husband looked like the old rich guy that had done well; still married in marriage number one, got the grandchildren, goes on his cruises and still in an active sex life. Fair play to him.

Still, it did get samey sometimes, it would be nice if something I'm not sure what was to happen. Maybe meet a guy, but I didn't know where to start, I couldn't even come out as wanting to be a woman, let alone find another guy who was into the same stuff. Huff huff! However it was warm tonight, this part of South London thankfully wasn't rough, the evening set a cozy warm navy blue in the air. I was looking forward to cooking fish tonight. I had two bags of shopping in each hand, that orange was depressing me though. I got to the lights and waited. There wasn't any cars but I waited anyway, which I never did. There was still nothing so I crossed the road.

However, if you've ever had that feeling of someone among you, when something is with you, lurking. That was happening to me right now. I never get into trouble or attract it so I put this night down to bad luck - a low life thug tried to snatch my shopping, but I wouldn't let go. I was quite proud of that. But he kept tugging and I tugged back.

"No. Please just stop" I said.

He didn't. Then I reconsidered him being a thug when I saw his weak eyes, his chin tucked to his chest, his sloping back and shoulders trying to touch the ground. I found he was just a desperate guy who had no choice but to one day get brave. He wasn't giving up without a fight, I had to give him that, the jolt from his tugs you could feel carried his entire life. I should have been stronger and kicked myself for what happened next; he tugged with both hands in a kind of Buzz Lightyear reach for the sky motion and immediately my wrist snapped. I heard the bone break, so did the brave weak guy, but he went Scot free with all four bags, result he thought probably. I held my wrist, it killed and I howled for a while. That is the last time I double bag! If I single bagged then they wouldn't have given much resistance. Luckily a couple of early twenties young people arrived and had called an ambulance, saying they had seen what happened. I felt like saying "Why the fuck didn't you help then?".

Atmospheres in hospitals are so bleak, I don't like them. The people in the beds around me all ill and maser-crated, then I was there with the big white cast on my arm. The operation happened earlier today and luckily I was leaving tomorrow. I felt out of place there like I was looking for sympathy with a little broken wrist, other people were dying, the overweight lady next to me was suffering from a life threatening illness, she couldn't walk, I felt bad for her. Then a nurse took my whole attention, she walked in with killer legs that seemed to stretch for ages. Her body was so in proportion, almost too perfect, like a lesbian that was too fit to be straight. And then the nurse looked at me and her whole being went straight through my body - she was a man.

"How are you George?" She said. George was my name.
"Good thanks" I replied.

I couldn't believe it, there was another one like me in the world. Her hands were really pretty, they were slim and delicate like a woman's, red nail vanish perfectly painted without a mess. Her name was Colette, that is what the name tag said. She placed the dinner on the trey with care and put it on my lap. I fancied her straight away. It was funny because I sensed a vibe coming from her too, the smile on her face couldn't hide itself, her seek for eye contact was present on a number of occasions. I thought to myself she could be a trans who was still into straight guys. It turned out she had been single ever since she had come out four years prior, so singletoness was over taking her soul like a demon at constant work and the slightest bit of attention wouldn't have taken much. Then I noticed my nails and varnish was still on them, also red, fuck I must have not removed them, I completely forgot. Colette saw this as she resumed a full standing position and she walked away, the tight lipped smile unable to be swayed.

TV dinner had been the same routine for too long. I felt like I was turning into one of those people who would eventually live with animals. The dinner was from Mark and Spencers, I changed the shopping routine the other week. Plus it was a home cooked meal, I was pleased with my discipline to make my own dinners and not become ones of those people who buy ready cooked meals. I was alone, so I wasn't going to make it worse by fucking up my organs too. Tonight it was a chicken casserole, the garlic was jumping onto my taste buds and the celery was a charming crunch in amongst the veg.

Mostly I was thinking of Colette, she was on my mind ever since I left the hospital. I wanted the courage to ask her out if I was ever to see her again. She inspired me, the way she was a woman in the real world, where I hadn't got the confidence to do that yet. My arm was healing and I was due to go back to the hospital to get the cast removed tomorrow. Warm thoughts filled my mind as to hopefully seeing her again, that would be amazing.

I sat on the hospital bed and waited for a nurse to arrive. I couldn't believe it, it was Colette! She walked to me with her medical equipment and trolley. Her tall slim frame chiseled underneath her nurses outfit, the smile had progressed to showing teeth.

"How is your arm George?" Colette said.
"Better" I replied.
"It would have healed"

Then she started to cut the cast off with really big scissors. Every snip I couldn't help to feel nervous, it was all too clear this was the nerves of liking someone. The attention in her eyes to the snipping was focused, but a part of her mind was somewhere else. When the cast came off I wiggled my wrist and it was just like new, and brand new arm.

"Feels normal again, it feels great" I said.
"A success" Colette replied.
"That is what we are here for"

Then the eye contact connected. I really wanted something to happen and knew she did too. Then she removed a piece of paper and gave it to me. It had her number on it. I thought that was cute, she was thoughtful.

I sat in the bar waiting. "No messing about" I kept going over and over in my head, it was do or die tonight. I was a woman in the world for the very first time and I felt good. I was also petrified underneath I won't lie, guys playing pool and around the bar I felt them - that sense of something haunting over your shoulder like the guy who mugged me for my shopping. All it takes is the slightest set of eyeballs to peer unwelcomingly at you, which then turns to two sets, then three. Soon enough you've got the entire world cup watching you at penalties. I was ready to leave. My now healthy wrist was getting agitated and that hand clutched my bag a little tighter. My drink was nearly finished.

Maybe Colette wasn't going to show. It must have been twenty minutes since we agreed to meet at eight. All the doubts were creeping in. Plus I hadn't come out to her that I was a trans too, I was going to surprise her tonight, see how she took it. Ah fuck maybe that was a mistake, maybe she wont take it well at all, I'm going to leave. But right then Colette arrived by the door in high black boots which covered her skinny jeans. She had a black leather jacket on too and her hair was done in curls, I was impressed how she managed to do that. She waved at me and walked into the bar, I stood up.

"Sorry I am late" She said.
"That's OK" I replied.

I was so nervous I couldn't say anything else. I just wanted the know what the reaction was going to be like when Colette saw me for who I really am. Was she going to stay or was she going to run? But the look on her face seemed like fireworks were going off inside her eyes. Seriously it seemed like me being a trans woman was the greatest thing she could have expected. She looked hot in her rocker side this night, a pleasant transformation from hard days at the hospital.

"I am very proud of you" She said in her polite females voice.
"Thanks. You too" I replied in my ladies tone I felt comfortable with.

Monday, 7 July 2014



All the walls were covered with hot guys like rock stars and yeah, more rock stars. Jamie sat on her bed reading a glossy magazine, the pages showed more rock men. Her eyes grew at the sight of them, but soon the familiar restlessness sprung and she threw the magazine across the room in a rage. She huffed; it was the sound of fed upness or spoilt attention seeking, however she was the type to get bored very quickly. Jamie was fifteen, brunette, slim and pretty sexy. She could have been the perfect girl if she wasn't such a bitch. The monstrous parts of her soul overtook the expressions in her eyes sometimes.

She went to her laptop and opened up Facebook. She typed in a password and an account opened which wasn't hers, it was a girl called Penny. Penny was blonde where most her pictures involved her flute and music friends. Others were close family pictures which suggested she was an 'in door goody two shoes girl' On her timeline Jamie wrote:

I just wanted to let everyone know the truth. I really feel the time has come for me to stop hiding and to start living. I owe it to myself and to everyone who knows me to live freely without boundaries, to live with truth and honesty... I am a lesbian. I feel so much better I have come out and I hope to live happily from this point forward xoxo

Jamie posted the post and had the devilish look on her face. Only that look was found on Jamie, making trouble she got pleasure from, to the depth of possible psychopathism in older age. She closed the account down and then opened her own account. She searched for a boy on her friend list - Luke. Her face changed, like an injection of joy pumped through her veins. Luke was like a baby rock star himself; long dark hair which covered his eyes, trendy slim fitted jeans, festival bands around his wrist. He was the same age as Jamie, most of his photos were basking with 'social proof'. With a smile which gleamed as bright as a light bulb, Jamie typed him a message:

Hey Luke. Was wondering if we are going to meet up next week? xx

She pressed enter. She really liked Luke, no-one made her more excited than him, not even her rock star hero's on her wall. She was in positive spirits right now because the little green light on her message box showed Luke was online. So she waited for his response... and waited... and waited... and waited. Twenty minutes had passed and still no response. Jamie's destructive mind didn't think he may have been busy, she rarely gave things if anything any mercy as she typically always thought the worst about stuff. The box didn't even say if Luke had 'seen' the message, so automatically Jamie thought she wasn't important to him and red filled her eyes and mind.

Chessie was Jamie's best friend. She looked quite similar to Jamie; same hair style, both brunette, same kind of scowled face a lot of the time. She was like the side kick as a lot of things they did were usually Jamie's idea. They were hanging out in a hut right now in a field, looking at glossy magazines and smoking cigarette's. It was early afternoon on a school day, they were in their school uniforms which meant the didn't go.

"That stupid Penny posted her stupid new car on Facebook" Jamie said.
"I know I saw it" Chessie replied.
"I'd like to do damage to it"
"That comment you put on her timeline was brilliant". Jamie smiles devilishly and takes another drag of her cigarette.
"It must piss you off how she likes Luke" Chessie said.
"The stupid cunt" Jamie replied.
"I know, she is soooo spoilt isn't she?"
"I was talking about that dick head Luke"
"What has he done?"
"I messaged him last night on Facebook and he still hasn't replied"
"You need to get him back"
"He's got a new car to, let's do some messing!" They nod at each other and dash out of the hut.

The girls creep into Luke's garden, climb over the fence and sneak up to Luke's car which is parked on the grass. It is a decent looking Mini Cooper.

"He's only just got this" Chessie said.
"I know. He will weep like he has never done before" Jamie replied.
"What are you going to do?" Jamie removes a knife well before Chessie finishes her question and slashes one of the back tyres.
"You bitch. But it is good" Jamie slashes all four tyres, the sound of them hisses out air.
"How is he going to like that?" Jamie said.
"I think he will cry to his mummy" Chessie replied. They then run away enthused with naughtiness and thrilled, hopping the fence and into the high green fields.

Jamie was daydreaming on her bed, looking at the ceiling. She did that quite often when she was on her own, she was a daydreamer. She didn't know it yet, but her ambition was waiting to be channeled some how. Her laptop was open, on Facebook, then that message sound beeped and for some reason Jamie dashed up and thought it was a particular person. As she clambered to the page she knew she was right... it was Luke.

Hi Jamie. Really sorry I haven't got back to you sooner. I really want to see you.

"He really wants to see me" Jamie kept playing over in her head. It was like her dreams had come true. "However there wasn't any kisses or a least a gay smiley face" she thought on. "Could he have suspected her to have something to do with his car?" Jamie got indecisive, but she would keep her mouth shut and lie to him if necessary. So she was willing to just run with it.

Come to mine.

Jamie left out a kiss or smiley face to see what kind of game he was playing. Immediately a message replied.

OK. See you in about 10 x

Jamie didn't buy the kiss. She remained suspicious and perhaps her skepticism was in the right place at the right time this time.

K x

But she put the kiss there anyway not to be rude.

The room glowed like it was a dream or something; lights shone on Jamie as she layed on her bed in a sexy black and red nighty. Luke entered the room and saw her on the bed. He was dressed in nothing but a well fitted pair of Calvin Klein boxer shorts. Electricity ran through Jamie's body, excitement exploding in every part of her soul. She was getting so hot she was moments away from getting wet. She already was if she was honest with herself. Luke's chiseled skinny boys body pounding out of those boxer shorts and he moved to the bed. Every moment seemed to last for a half hour. His big blue eyes made Jamie drown in ecstasy. Then he touched her leg and she put her foot on his chest. She was about to explode.

Then knocks on her door woke her up out of her fantasy. She got up off the bed quite surprised with the fantasy she created.

"Jamie. Luke is here" Jamie's mum said from outside.
"Alright, come in" Jamie replied.

Luke walked in with Jamie's mum, by this time Jamie was pretending to read something intellectual, holding the book in her hand and looking to Luke like she was some kind of swat.

"Hi Jamie" Luke said.
"Hi Luke" Jamie replied.
"You two be good" Jamie's mum added.
"OK mum, get out of my room"

Jamie's mum leaves. Jamie looks at Luke who stands in an image just like Jamie is used too; jeans, and leather jacket - hot she thought, not quite the image in her fantasy, but close enough. He took off the jacket and put it on the chair which was next to the laptop. The page was on Facebook in Penny's account and Jamie's eyes grew with fear of Luke seeing it, but he didn't and he sat next to her on the bed.

"Thanks for coming" Jamie said.
"I wanted to tell you something" Luke replied.
"OK. Go"
"Penny has asked me out"
"What did you say?"
"I said I'd get back to her about it"
"You came here to tell me that!"
"I quite like you too"
"Then go out with me" Jamie said. Then Luke becomes flustered.
"Things have been tough with school, this and my car"
"Your new car! What happened?"
"Someone slashed the tyres"
"Oh my God, that is awful"
"I will break the persons legs when I found out who did it" Rage in Luke's eyes made Jamie hot.
"Also did you see Penny's post about being gay on her Facebook page?"
"She says it was a prank, that someone hacked her account"
"Who knows"
"You didn't have anything to do with that did you?" Luke said. An imaginary light made Jamie burst one sweat.
"So are we going out?"
"Let's watch a film hey"
"Cool. Pick one"

Luke went to the shelf and started choosing. Jamie used this chance to go to her laptop. She saw all the mockery people were posting on Penny's timeline about her being gay, she smiled darkly then logged out of her account.

Friday, 6 June 2014

Summer Approaching

Summer Approaching

Heat blistered the surface, the crystals in the pool glowed like firefly's in the night. The friends layed on the pool chairs around the water, catching their sun tans like they were a painting or a row of statues. They all had their sun glasses on. Micky was to the far right, he had long hair like a girl, he liked that fact and refused to move on from the core grunge days of 90s Nirvana. He was the groups second guitarist. Next to him was Alan, the really tall Julian from The Strokes resemblance. He was the most nuts and daring, the lead guitarist. In the center was the little queen, Zara, unique for her short and serious bleached white hair. She was the vocalist of the group and she liked being the center of attention, which was ironic because she was in the center of the group sunbathing right now.

To Zara's left was Jimmy, the bass player, almost as tall as Alan, notable for his really deeper voice. And finally Sam to the far left, the drummer who was the youngest and the pretty boy. The sun kept beating down, all of them were like dead fish flopped on the pool chairs. The exclusive looking fences made of bushes around the garden cocooned the space. The important looking mansion sat behind them, the picture; a perfect Saturday afternoon in a St John's Wood high life surrounded by millions.

Zara was thinking to herself as she took another sip of her Moscow Mule and then rested back on the chair again. She was happy about the band she was in, they were her best friends, her life. Being the lead female in a band, she felt she had found fulfillment and her band were like her brothers. They had just finished the tour of their new album and were having a well earned break. She felt they deserved it and had been waiting all year to enjoy the summer in their home of London.

Sam had his headphones in and was listening to the bands latest album as he layed on his pool chair. His mind rested the least out of the group as drumming and music continued on. Micky was blank, he may have been asleep but he was thinking about his parents. It was their mansion they were chilling in, they were a mega successful band called Winters Skin, sixty years of age and still going strong. They weren't around for the summer, they said to Micky where they were going was a surprise and they would contact him about it when the time was right. In the mean time they left the house to Micky and his friends for the summer.

Still the band never felt such relaxation, it must have been at least thirty five degrees, easily the hottest day since they had been back in London. Their band name was simple Dance. Then, as if God had turned out the lights it started raining. Thunder sounded and it all happened so quickly. The band transformed into cover rather than sun bathing odyssey. They didn't know what the hell was going on. It kept raining and more thunder roared, they retreated into the house.

Rain pounded down outside of the car window. Jimmy was driving, Alan stared blankly out of the window.

"So much for a hot summer" Alan said.
"It's shit" Jimmy replied.
"Let's hope it doesn't rain when we are there" Micky said.
"I wouldn't get your hopes up" Sam replied.

Zara said nothing. She was utterly disappointed with the cats and dogs going on outside. This was their break she thought and they were on their way to Glastonbury. It was all going wrong. It had been raining non stop for about a week. Everyone was gloomy in the car, passing other cars who looked like pissed off festival goers on the way to Glastonbury also.

It continued to rain and the entire fields were like a drenched swamp. Festival goers everywhere were unhappy, trying to do up their tents. The boys were doing up two tents of their own, hiding in their rain jackets like they were defending themselves from the sea. Zara was looking into the distance at the views of Worthy Farm. The landscape was huge, she had never been to Glastonbury before. The stages and attractions was quite a sight, it was so much bigger in the flesh when usually that cliche was the opposite. She looked back at her 'brothers' doing battle with the tents and she wanted to help them, but they told her to leave it to them, a male pride thing she thought. It was the Thursday, the 'checking in' day at Glastonbury. The once hyper charged kids to Zara's left and right seemed like a funeral event. It was the weather, Zara felt their summer was being sabotaged. Glastonbury was ahead, but not as planned.

Friday, the first officially day of music and entertainment. The guys were collecting hot dogs by a stand.

"Who shall we see first?" Micky said.
"I heard there is a secret show on The Park Stage" Alan replied.

The mood was still flat, it was really difficult to really enjoy the excitement of something as great as Glastonbury when one was drenched constantly. Then a group of plucky festival goers walked past the band and said Winters Skin were supposed to be the secret show. Micky overheard this and became alert "What, really??" he thought. Then, like an act of God just witnessed the rain stopped and the clouds disappeared and the sun stared beating through. Practically the entire festival stood still in amazement and looked to the sky. It was kind of an eerie picture, like out of the scene in Shawshank Redemption. Jimmy wanted someone to say something because it was getting a little weird. Then Micky got a text on his phone.

Come to The Park Stage in half hour. We are playing. Surprise :) xx

It was from his mum. It was true, they were playing at Glastonbury.

"Come on, we are going to The Park Stage. My parents are playing" Micky said.
"What!" Sam replied.
"I know. It's true. Come on"

At The Park Stage, a Winters Skin banner was on the stage, it was really happening. The guys had made their way reasonably near the front and were excited. Thousands of Winters Skin fans were around them, it seemed like they were swimming in the bands sperm - loyally crazed fans. The sun was shining down at thirty plus, it was so hot people had their tops off now. The guys didn't know what to make of the sudden change, it was weird, but good weird. Then Micky's parents and the rest of the group walked out onto the stage, waving and an uproar erupted like the only kind you experience at an occasion as massive as Glastonbury. Micky smiled at his family and legends in front of him, the rest of the guys were ready to go festive crazy as the sun took no mercy on the party below.

Thursday, 5 June 2014



The beach stretched for miles and is was surprisingly quiet he thought. He walked along, pleased to be there in Australia, the change he needed. The crash and bang of London noise had got too much and the open air and scorching heat was the medicine. He walked tall in his tall, gangly frame and had a seat. He looked out to the ocean in front of him. Thinking was what he did most of the time; right now he was thinking of hoping to find himself. That was what moving to Australia was about. Something about him was unfulfilled and he had heard countless times that happiness comes from within. He could have moved anywhere in the world and still be unhappy - that was a fear of his before moving to Australia. However so far he was feeling fine.

A kangaroo was jumping a few meters behind him, then a second one about half the size. It must be a mother and it's cub he thought, they made him smile. They started to chomp on leaves. The mother yanked off a whole branch and passed it to her cub who feasted on the leaves hungrily. He felt at peace when he watched this and loved how nature was so wonderful when you just stopped and looked at it, listened to it. He had never seen a kangaroo before, there surely wasn't any back in England or that he knew of.

He had been in Australia for one week. So far he never wanted to return to London. The heat powered down on all his body; this was another thing you surely didn't get in London he smiled to himself, forty plus baby. Some youngsters appeared with their surf boards and were jogging to the sea. They were about his age; twenty five or so, twenty somethings he corrected himself, that reference easier this day in age. They seemed in an excitable spirit, their trunks were the sort of trouser trunks style he recognized some people wearing when he was on holiday; they were Australians he came to think of it, that was their thing. They were saying things like "Gooday Mayate". He smiled at this as he was trying to pick up the real Australian lingo in the flesh rather than believing they way they were portrayed in those Fosters adverts for example.

They were attacking the waves like missiles. One of the guys took no prisoners; he moved to a wave like it was dual battle, and then whipped back, to and back, to and back. It was entertaining and he was impressed. Then another group of twenty somethings appeared and sat on another part of the beach. They had beer, a portable radio and food. Their Australian accents so bold, he knew you had actually be in the country to experience the one hundred percent authenticity of it. They chatted away. He looked over a few times and something in him had started to feel right. It felt like happiness.

Two years was all his Visa would allow him to stay. He was grateful for that at least and also to have gotten a job on a nearby farm. He didn't care he had traded in a nine till five office job on a good salary for next to nothing as a trainee farmer. London was eating him up, the open peace was piecing something back together - hopefully, he hoped. Then soon enough more people started to swam onto the beach, he wondered if an event or something was going to happen, but remembered it was about 6pm - people had finished work.

Two girls, woman actually, he had a habit for labeling females as girls even if they were women, a habit he swore he'd break, however they were sitting to his right. One of them kept looking at him and he got nervous. He swore not to be shy in his life, so he looked back and she waved him over. He was really nervous now and it felt like one of those moments where you had to not think but act. So he got up and went to them. As he arrived the waver looked strangely familiar, but he couldn't make it out. She had long blonde hair and a smile which glistened, the other was a brunette. He sat.

"Hi" She said
"Hi" he replied.
"I'm Sadie and this is my friend Madeleine"
"Nice to meet you, I'm Danny"
"Nice to meet you" the girls replied.

Danny felt he did well by not greeting with usual London "alright" after a bad experience; he was slapped by an Australian woman because she thought he was suggesting their was something wrong with her. From then he had to remember London and Sydney were different even though they spoke the same language.

"I have seen you before" Sadie said.
"Really? I was thinking the same about you but I couldn't make out where"
"Do you work on a farm?"
"That's it. It is my dads farm"
"Really, what a coincidence"
"It is. Are you new to Australia?"
"Yes. I've been here for one week"
"Where about's in England are you from?" Danny liked how she presupposed his home.
"London" Sadie's eyes sparkled at the way Danny said this in his paper cut London accent.
"Are you on a long vacation or living here?" Madeleine added.
"Living. Only for two years because that is all my VISA allows"
"Why OZ?" Sadie asked and was determined to take back control of the conversation.
"I don't know?"
"Do you know anybody here?"
"You must be brave to start a new life in a new country on your own"
"I needed a change"
"Won't you get lonely?" Danny felt the feeling all too well.
"I am on my own, but not altogether lonely"
"Well, you have new friends now"
"Yeah, right one dude" Madeleine said enthusiastically.
"Thanks guys. I am glad to have new friends"
"We'll take you out, you'll see everything Oz has to offer"
"Sounds good"

Sadie kept her eyes on Danny longer once the conversation was settling. He noticed this and it felt like an attraction there. Friends was more than he could ask for as it wasn't easy making new friends. Possibly Sadie could potential be a girlfriend, but something like that was always a bonus and wasn't at the forefront of his ambitions. However her eyes told no lies as eyes never do, and something might just...

Danny waited outside a bar, the bar Sadie and Madeleine suggested they meet at. It was '8pm' and he was still waiting. He wore his light white shirt, straight jeans and loafers; he wasn't in OZ long enough to be converted to flip flops in the evening just yet! He was excited as it was going to be his first night out in Sydney, something he had to do when the time came. And he was pleased he had made new friends, got a job - things were looking promising. Soon enough Sadie arrived - on her own. She wore a pretty yellow skirt and heels, Danny was stunned. He thought she was dressing up just for him to remind him of his home, then, maybe not.

"Hey dude" She said.
"Hey" Danny replied.
"Madeleine can't make it, she got ill" Danny sensed their wasn't truth to that as it was one of the oldest ones in the book. But what could that mean he thought?
"Sorry to hear that"
"No worries. I just wanted to go out with you anyway. You k with that?"
"Yeah, of course"

Australia seemed like a god send and he had only been here for a month. So many things were falling into Danny's space, piecing his life together like a constant snowball. He had friends and it seemed he was on a date with Sadie now. She hooked his arm as they went into the bar and the night still young.

Sunday, 4 May 2014



Vulnerable, bullied and defenseless. That's all she knew. But she made a decision to try and become a whole person before it was too late.

Inspired by "Carrie"

Arms folded, chin tucked to her chest, her eyes peeping left and right as if she was being nosy at others, but when you looked directly back into her eyes, the emotion in them screamed 'need'. However she would continue to walk on, a gear before running like she was afraid of anything and everything that came her way. Some teenagers looked at her and jeered among their groups, rattling off how much of a weirdo she was. The girls hair looked in need of a wash, her clothes came across as a hundred years old, her hunch was so high it was like a hanger pulled it forward. She was so shy people around her jumped when her shadowy presence took them by surprise.

All her books were around her on the table in the library, most of which were philosophy books. She was deep in concentration at her work, so tense writing on the paper. She always heard her mothers voice in the back of her mind saying "You are at University to work, not to make friends". She let the voice dwell knowing she had always been controlled by her mum but never had the strength to stand up to her. A group of third year girls sat on the same table as Katherine (the girls name) nattering quietly before they got their books out. They caught a glimpse of Katherine and everything about her unconfident presence made them think she was a weirdo straight away. Katherine felt afraid immediately, cradling her books closer to her, fear in her heart pounding stronger.

Katherine felt afraid in the company of others, she had the fearful feeling in her soul most of the time. She looked at the girls very slowly, mindful of possibly being attacked, but ultimately she hoped to make a friend. She didn't know why she always felt scared, the feeling in her chest made her feel like she was dying, it was probably because of her institution type household and her single and strict religious parent she thought. But she wanted friends more than anything and wasn't going to listen to her mother. She thought; she had no friends during secondary school and now she was on her own in Uni, she had to try before it was too late. The group of girls caught 'the witch girl' creeping at them with her dark mysterious eyes and they immediately turned to each other with freaked out faces. Katherine felt hurt, but it was nothing new, she was used to kids being freaked out around her and didn't know why, all she knew inside is she was trying.

Books were put in their places correctly, always, as Katherine liked doing a thorough job. She liked her bookshop part time job, it was quiet, inspiration bouncing off the books in every isle was the image she had of the place. Other students worked there too, the owner was a retired teacher named Flora and she was on the shop floor cleaning would you believe it. She had a lot of energy for her age, cleaning in all directions and Katherine always remembered Flora telling her she quit being a teacher to do her passion - owning a bookshop. Flora sat in her chair behind the counter going over some accounts. The glint or vibe she gave off made you think she loved the shop and all of her students filling the roles of part time assistants whilst at Uni every year.

Katherine looked at Marvin, an animated character who worked their. He was in her year and was talking enthusiastically to customers. Katherine kept re-shelving her books going into thoughts about Marvin. She liked him but he hadn't talked to her since she worked there. None of the students did. Soon enough Katherine was behind the till cashing goods for booky customers. The students next to her kept a familiar distance. When Katherine found the courage from somewhere to actually try and speak to them, their responses was quick and that of wanting the conversation to be over, or it existed at all. Then like night and day they would talk to the other students normally forgetting about Katherine and hoping she got the message.

Rows of bars were behind Katherine and the noise of youngsters were the only sounds coming from them. The sea was in front of her and the long stretch of the Southampton shore, evening was setting. Katherine was eating her Pret sandwich, the Pret carrot cake by her side with a diet Coke. This was dinner or a snack dinner, she hadn't decided yet, but it was a routine she had when on a shift at the book shop and she never got that hungry later in the evening anyway. Plus the Pret was right next to her work so it was convenient and by the time she got their, they were clearing out stock that was going to be thrown out and she got deals - it was a little scheme she conjured and was quite proud of it, it made her smile. Katherine liked the quite of the sea, but the back of her mind only heard the students in the bars. She felt like she needed to blend in with the rest of them, she wanted too, but she was absolutely petrified of social situations.

Usually the dorm room was half tidy and half messy. When Katherine walked in to see that it was all messy and six students having a somewhat party, she knew her tidy side of the room was infiltrated again. Her room mate Megan, a skinny blonde had invited her mutual friends round for one of their occasions, Katherine was intimidated - in her own home. She thought she'd like to try and stay this time and overcome her social hurdle. The kids were taking drugs, drinking and dancing to music, Megan and her jock boyfriend kissing on Megan's bed. The looks Katherine got was that of normal; the kids glanced at her, said something which sounded like a forced "Hello" and carried on with their party like she was a ghost. Megan rolled her eyes at her boyfriend and said "Hi Katherine" and wished she'd get lost. That's when Katherine scurried towards her book on her shelf then scurried to the study room out of their way.

Page two hundred and twenty eight was explaining the climax to the chapter. The party was pounding away in the next room. Katherine flicked through her book. She got used to her space in the study room when Megan had her gang were round, but now she really wanted to join them because she was trying to change. However she remembered her place - that she wasn't wanted there. Then Megan appeared.

"Hey Katherine" Megan said.

It made Katherine jump because she thought a trick was being played on her, she wasn't used to Megan talking to her when her friends were round.

"Hi" Katherine replied.
"Are you OK?".
"How is your book?".
"It's good".
"You and your books. Anyway, the guys are staying over and we will need your bed. You'll be cool if we use it won't you?".

Katherine knew she'd be sleeping on the floor again, which probably meant in the study. She didn't want too, but she didn't have the strength to say no, she's never said no. And she thought this could be a good opportunity to do as Megan says to hopefully gain friends and acceptance soon, so...

"Yes, that's fine".
"Great, you are a star. Thanks cheeks".

And Megan left. An hour or two later, Katherine was crawled on the floor in the study room with some spare blankets, trying to sleep. But the moans and groans of six students next door having sex kept her awake. It being in her bed didn't concern her much, nor did the fact she never had sex and couldn't imagine what it would be like to be a part of the orgy. What kept her awake was the noise. She put her fingers in her ears and that helped.

Attention towards the lecturer was ninety percent, the ones that were jaded away with thoughts were those who were on the way to failing or dropping out. Katherine was listening, hunched, her hair covering a lot of her face, crowding her desk with her arms like she was hugging it. But her attention was razor sharp, listening, taking in the information. Marvin was listening a few seats in front of Katherine. He had a large back and was making notes that he found useful. Katherine's mind for the first time had started to get distracted by him, her eyes were becoming memorized, staring deeper and deeper going into day dreams.

Marvin was dreamy to her, she felt uncontrollable un-settlement inside which she never had done. She didn't know what it was, it could only have been love, but she didn't know such a thing ever. She wanted to talk to him somehow, then remembered an on campus party was happening that night and that would be the perfect chance. A small grin which turned into a sparkling smile appeared on her face. She forgot how pretty she looked when she smiled and knew the party was the opportunity and also for her to beat the social barrier.

Katherine stood by the wall in the hall. She was so close to it she looked stuck to it. She was petrified inside, everything around her seemed like a jungle of fearless beats and she was prey at anytime. But she did her best to stay there for as long as she could. She held her apple juice and looked around, hoping to talk to someone or someone to talk to her, anything to happen rather than being alone in a social situation. Marvin appeared in her sight and her heart started to race. Marvin was chatting away and making animated movements like he was telling a joke and all the people around him were laughing. Katherine kept looking at him hoping he would see her, then he did and she looked away immediately. When she looked back he was still looking at her then she looked away again. She didn't understand why she was looking away when she wanted to speak to him, the nerves took over her. Then when she looked back he was walking towards her and her heart was beating out of her chest. She felt so uneasy she could have run away.

"It's really good to see you Katherine" Marvin said.

Katherine couldn't believe what was happening. She had no control over the smile which wouldn't leave her face. She felt she made an effort; wearing her best pale dress and heels which were starting to break a little. Marvin was dapper in a cool shirt, dark trousers and polished shoes.

"Thank you" Katherine replied.
"You should come out more often, you look really good".
"Thank you. You look good too".

A striking brunette named Elsie appeared and took Marvin's arm forcefully.

"Come on, I've been looking everywhere for you" Elsie said. Then she saw Katherine.

Then she dragged Marvin away and he didn't look back. It all happened so fast Katherine didn't process it immediately, but soon enough she found herself standing by herself again, and it started to feel awful - being by herself. However the party continued and soon enough Katherine was back at the drinks table pouring another apple juice. A boy named Terry stood next to her, he was on the shorter side, came across as slightly creepy and had a really pointy face and the thick glasses he wore made him look like a weasel. He didn't care much about her personal space and touched his arm against hers.

"I don't see you out much" Terry said. Katherine didn't know what to say back.
"I saw you talking to Marvin earlier, so you like him?".
"He's really nice".
"You've got competition".
"I don't like him".
"That's good because I am going to kiss you now. Just see what it is like".

Then Terry tried to kiss her. Katherine was shaken to bits and she pulled away instantly. Then Terry forced himself more and Katherine pulled back so far both almost fell on the table.

"What is it?" Terry said.
"No" Katherine  replied, then a look of attack built in the rat looking boys eyes and he whispered into Katherine's ear.
"Turning me down for Marvin! Go home you bitch. You have no friends, no one likes you, you are a total joke here. Go back to your room where you belong freak".

Marvin stared piercingly into Katherine's eyes. Katherine was so hurt she started to cry and then ran out of the hall.

Katherine sat on her bed crying uncontrollably. Megan and her friends were out, it was just her. She didn't feel any of the confidence she had built up. She wanted to leave University and go home, but the thought of her mother knowing that scared her even more. Her legs pressed to her chin and the tears kept coming, it had been almost two hours. She didn't know what to do, things seemed hopeless. Then she thought about Marvin and her dreams about him seemed impossible.

The hallway was in a usual transitional mode, Katherine was walking along in her shadowy, to ones self way. An arm grabbed her and she turned around to see Terry.

"Katherine I'm really sorry for what I said". He said.

Katherine was about to jump out of her skin with freight. She snatched her arm back and walked away even faster, but Terry caught up with her again and he did the same thing.

"Hey. I mean it, it was a really shitty thing what I said. I'm saying sorry". Something made Katherine listen. Terry sensed he had her.

"Thank you for not running away. I want to make it up to you".
"Come to my dorm room tonight, some of us are having a little party". Something didn't sit right with Katherine.
"Why do you want to invite me?".
"We just do, we felt you were really brave for coming out the other night, we want to include you".
"Please, don't do this, you are just going to trick me or something".
"No honestly we are not, we want you to make friends". Katherine thought about this and she became convinced of something possibly good happening.

Katherine knocked on the door. Something felt strange because there was no noise and nothing sounded like a party. Then Terry opened the door.

"Hi Katherine" He said. And he let her in.

There was only four boys in the room, sprawled on chairs and beds, two of them had their tops off. There was also a funny smell in the room, probably drugs Katherine thought. Terry closed the door and stood in front of her.

"Glad you came" He said.
"Has the party just started?" Katherine replied. Some of the boys sniggered which seemed strange to Katherine.
"It has now" Terry said.

Then all the boys stood up and three walked to Katherine and the other to the door. They started to touch her and she was shaking.

"Stop it" Katherine said.

The boys and Terry didn't. Then Katherine screamed and Terry covered her mouth.

"Shut up or we will make your life hell forever here. Especially if you tell anyone what is about to happen".

Then the boys undressed Katherine  and she cried into Terry's hand, trembling from head to toe. She was so scared she couldn't breath, her mind wouldn't allow her to think because her world was spinning out of control.

Katherine sat on her bed crying her eyes out. She was weak, her body was frail and in pain. Her hair and clothes looked like she had been involved in a rape - she was and the images of it were like black boards of evil in her mind. The endless replay of it seemed like hell. The only thing she thought about was her mum, and as difficult as it was to get her phone out and search for her mums number was the only option she had.

"Mum, I want to come home" Katherine said.
"Why are you crying dear?" Her mother replied.
"I just want to come home".
"Are you hurt".
"By who?".

Katherine didn't want to say by boys or friends because her mum would flip. But she sensed her mum already knew the answer.

"By boys or friends wasn't it?".
"What have I told you? This is your fault. I told you not to make friends or date boys. Not yet. They will hurt you. You are there to get your degree and that is it".
"I'm sorry mum. But I really have to come home".
"No. You are not coming home. You finish your degree first. If you would have listened to me then you wouldn't have got in this mess. And that is all I have to say".

Then the phone went dead.

"Mum" Katherine cried.

But the telephone line stayed dead. Katherine dropped her phone to the bed and cried even more. She had never felt so alone. There wasn't anyone, no-one to turn too, she had no-one. Then she looked ahead and thought about her life.

Megan pushed the dorm room door open drunkenly with her boyfriend, kissing and undressing each other. Out of the corner of her eye she saw something then the eye went as wide as a tennis ball.

"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghhhh" Megan screamed.

The boyfriend looked at the image and screamed too. Katherine was hung from the ceiling by the sheets around her neck. She was dead and her feet hung just above the ground.